Newcomers to the WSOP are overwhelmed by a lot of things. But there's one conversation that always takes place between a newbie and a WSOP veteran:

Newbie: "What's that sound?"

Vet: "What sound?"

Newbie: "What sound? It sounds like a 17-year cicada plague!"

Vet: "Oh, that. Just chips."

The interesting bit is that if the only sound you heard was necessary chip movement, it would be almost inaudible. But show me ten poker players, and I'll show you seven people playing with their chips. Riffling. Stacking and restacking. Clicking together. I'll leave it to the DSM IV crowd to interpret the why - I'm just reporting. But it is unmistakable and unique to poker tournaments and poker rooms. Blackjack players don't do it. Unless they're secret poker players.

I am told that essentially all citizens of Western civilization have a notch in their hearing right at the frequency of road traffic. If we didn't, we'd go out of our minds trying to constantly process the incoming signal. So it is with poker players - our brains have told our ears to ignore the plastic cicadas - else we'd all go mental.

But if you're not in Las Vegas and miss the non-stop buzz, this is for you:

Note #2, #3, and #4 seats all doing their part for the cacaphony.

Occasionally your girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, office colleague, etc. will look at you in amazement and say, "You just sat and played poker for how many hours? How can you possible do that?"

As a public service to the poker community, we present here a single picture that explains how one accidentally finds oneself playing poker all night:

Everything you need for an all-night poker game

• Purple arrow pointing toward 10:00. Yes, that's four cards, which means we must be playing PLO. Rather that just a single two-card option, the PLO player has six different two-card combinations from which to choose. It's difficult to find a reason to fold.
• Two yellow arrows. Pointing at very big chip stacks. Those are black chips sitting on top of seat #5's stack. Big chip stacks mean there's lots of money to win or lose and, well, it's hard to leave if you're deeply stuck. It's also hard to leave if you feel that you have a fair chance to move those big stacks over in front of you, even if you're not stuck.
• Red arrows. Three of them, pointing toward big piles of chips already in the middle of the table. Big pots. It's hard to leave when you feel that yet another four-figure pot might break out at any moment.
• Black arrow pointing to 10:00. Double-vodka cranberry. Motivates the players to move the large stacks (yellow arrows) toward the middle (red arrows). It's hard to leave when double-vodka cranberries are fueling conversations that go like, "Pot." "Pot? Pot!" "Pot, pot? Pot!!"

Anyway, the next thing you know, the shift manager is asking you if you want a breakfast comp? Breakfast comp? Uh-oh.

Upon returning to my hotel room as the sun is coming up, I realize I have a breakfast engagement at the very site of the all-nighter. Hoping to extract a silver-lining from this sleep-deprivation cloud, your intrepid blogger dons his walking clothes and hoofs it the 1.7 miles to the Wynn, getting in some all-too-rare aerobic exercise in Las Vegas. You also get some pictures that are rarely seen:

No, your eyes are not playing tricks on you

This is, indeed, the eastern face of the Mirage, just catching the glimpes of the rising sun. The fountains are still shaded behind the buildings on the east side of the Strip. Las Vegas is waking up to a new morning.

Going from my home in the Blue Ridge mountains of North Carolina to Las Vegas requires only that I show a drivers license and boarding pass to the proper TSA authorities. Sometimes it feels as if I should be presenting my passport and proper inter-galactic transfer documents.

You get off the plane at McCarran and are immediately bombarded with a sea of humanity, the clang of slot machines, the larger-than-life ads for the various shows. Then you step outside the airport and are slammed with larger-than-life heat.

Toto, we're not in Appalachia anymore.

In my particular case it was even more chaotic than usual. I branched directly from the airport to the Rio so I could get on the ESPN webcast of the Tournament of Champions at the WSOP. [1] The cabbie was pissed at me for asking him to take Paradise rather than the (longer) Tunnel/I-215 route so he got my bag out of the trunk, dropped it on the pavement and drove away without a word. The cabbie behind him looked at me with a bemused expression, clearly wondering what I'd done to twist the guy's knickers. Ah, Vegas cabbies.

I dropped my bags at the bell desk and headed straight for the ESPN room. Like all broadcasting rooms, it was approximately 30% too small for the people and hardware that needed to be in there, but it was good to be back in the broadcasting saddle. This is my first gig with ESPN and I'm delighted to part of it. In particular, it's cool to work with Matt Maranz, who heads up the ESPN broadcasting of both the WSOP and the NAPT. And it's extra cool to be working with James Hartigan and Francine Watson, friends who I made while doing broadcasting on the European Poker Tour. I also got to see my old friend Dan Goldman who was doing some color commentary too.

Nerve center of the ESPN WSOP webcast

At the top left of the image you see the aforementioned Francine, and to her left, Dylan Boucherle, whose mom lives in my hometown. Small world. Producer Charlie Dixon, with whom I'm working for the first time, is front and center-ish.

It's not NCIS, but it gets the job done

This is the view from the command post. The two backs in the front of the image are (L to R) Matt Maranz and Dave Swartz. Note Dave's iPad already occupying a place of importance in the broadcast.

At least for now, it's good to be back in the buzz. And it's always good to hang with my poker milieu friends whom I see all too rarely. One of those people is Pauly McGuire, whose blog is a must-read for anybody who likes good writing, and/or Phish, and/or poker.

The Tao of the WSOP

[1] You can watch Day 2 today beginning at 3:00 PM Eastern Time at:

   http://www.espn3.com

or

   http://www.ustream.tv/channel/wsop-toc

Cake Poker just announced that they are increasing their minimum buy-ins for their NL Holdem ring games starting this April 8, 2010. Cash game buy-ins will be bumped up from 20 BB to 30 BB in order to mitigate the effects of short stack play and increase the fun and competitiveness for players. For players who enjoy playing a short stack poker game,  20 BB tables in low stakes games will still be available.
 
Cake Poker’s card room manager Lee Jones explained the change in a recent press release:
 
“We realize that the issue of ‘short-stacking’ is a contentious one. It’s completely within the rules of poker to play a short stack as long as you buy in for at least the minimum amount. For that reason, we were hesitant to make any changes in our minimum buy-ins. However, taken to their extreme, short-stack strategies all but eliminate any post-flop play in no-limit hold ’em. Furthermore, online poker allows players to double up their short stack and then immediately leave their table and move to another one – something that would be impossible in “brick and mortar” poker. For that reason, we felt obliged to make a change that would ensure those who want to play larger stacks have an environment in which they can do that. We believe that moving to a 30 big-blind minimum buy-in will accomplish this.
 
We do, however, understand that many people prefer to play shorter stacks simply because it reduces their exposure to one very good second-best hand costing them a large amount of money. Also, many cash game novices prefer to play with shorter stacks while getting their feet wet in cash game play; it’s definitely a different environment than tournaments. Therefore, in our smaller games, we will offer “shallow” tables, which will have a buy-in range of 20-50 big blinds. Those games will be a great training ground for the newbies and a place where the short-stack specialists can practice their craft. We will, of course, continue to offer 30-100 big-blind buy-in games at those stakes as well.”
 
Cake Poker is committed to being the most fun and rewarding site in online poker. This change reflects that commitment.

When you go to a poker tournament, you hope for a table full of clueless fish. Donkeys, tourists, whatever you want to call them. Presumably if you've put up $10,000 or won a satellite of some sort, you'd prefer to get good value for your money. So I wonder what these guys are thinking:

A Phil Ivey / Tom Dwan sandwich

Yes, that's the unmistakable haircut of Tom "Durrr" Dwan on the right-hand edge of the picture. And both of the unnamed players in this image are old enough to remember Humphrey Bogart's classic line when Lauren Bacall walks into his casino: "Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine." Or, "There are three starting days, 20-30 tables every day. And I end up squeezed between two of the toughest poker players on the planet."

On the other hand, maybe they're secretly delighted. After all, every story they tell at the local poker game will now start out, "So, there I was, sitting between Phil Ivey and Tom Dwan..." Like the credit card commercial points out, some things are priceless. For these guys' sake, I hope they get $10K worth of memories.

First, we had two women dressed sort of like Carmen Miranda parading around. After that, we had a very loud recording of the AC%DC classic, "It's a Long Way to the Top (if You Wanna Rock 'n Roll)". At least, that's what I thought until I stepped out of the media room. It was a live band, including a guitarist dressed in the British schoolboy uniform that Angus Young made famous. They rocked hard - pity that we only got to hear the one song.

At 12:45, only about 15 minutes past schedule, the cards went into the air. Cake qualifier 1$ickDi$ea$e had already built a nice stack when I got to him:

1$ickDi$ea$e contemplates his next move

This next image is of two players you probably won't recognize; I certainly didn't. But this scene sums up the tension of a poker tournament. These two guys had built a big pot on a board of A-7-7--Q--9. No flush possible. On the river, the guy in the Portland jersey put in the rest of his chips.

Does he have it, or doesn't he?

This is what poker tournaments come down to. When the cards go on their backs and the dealer runs out the board, the interesting part of poker is over. Now it's just up to a randomly shuffled deck of cards. It's no more fascinating than watching a roulette wheel spin or a pair of dice bounce across a felt. But this moment - this is the essence of poker. The jersey guy's statement is clear: "I have a very big hand - one so good I'm prepared to risk my participation in the Aussie Millions on it." But the beauty, the core of poker: he may be lying. The gray-hoodied opponent was stumped. He looked at his cards, looked at the bettor, and sighed. He thought, he looked at Jersey-guy again. He looked up at the ceiling. This was not Hollywooding - he had a tough decision to make. I thought he probably had trip sevens, but with a weak kicker. In the meantime, Jersey-guy looked around, sipped his water. Who know what was going through his mind? "Call. Please call." Or "If he calls, I'm having an early dinner. Then I'm going home to kick the dog."

Finally Gray-hoodie sighed and shoved his cards toward the dealer. I thought I even detected some extra "oomph" in the shove: "Take these away before I change my mind and make a bad call." This wasn't a moment for the TV cameras but as far as I was concerned it is moments such as these that fill poker tournaments. During those seconds, both of the players were unquestionably, inarguably alive.

Last night, the Crown Casino turned an upstairs function room into a TV studio and held a $100K buy-in tournament. This gave all the photographers and celebrity seekers a dynamite opportunity to see all of their heroes in one location. Tony G arrived on a bicycle, pedaled by a P*rty P*ker rent-a-babe. The other players, to my knowledge, walked in under their own power.

Some of these guys are so legendary that their "auras" remain even after they've left the room. Here's the proof:

Erick Lindgren knows Barry Greenstein left the room...

But can't shake the sense that he's still there...

Then there's the conversation that takes place among people who have the world by the tail. The thing that they most worry about is who has the best MP3 collection on his iPod...

I have the complete collection of Safri Duo - do you not?

Of course, the alternate title there is "OMG - do you realize how much rake Full Tilt has made since we sat down?" John Juanda, in the meantime, is reaching the top level on his Soduko app.

But even among the high-rollers, there is still a pecking order. Before the event started, a photographer asked Chris Ferguson if he could take his picture. Chris, sitting next to Doyle's Room pro Dani "Ansky" Stern, said "Sure." No, no - the photographer wanted Chris's picture with a couple of beautiful young women. "Even better..." commented Ferguson, bouncing up from his seat.

Dani Stern will get his chance. But later.

Neither Ferguson nor Stern made it to the final table - the action was fast and furious because they had to be out of the room that evening. Turns out there was a bar mitzvah in that room the next day.

I'm here in Melbourne, Australia (after an obscenely long couple of plane flights) for Crown's Aussie Millions Poker Championship, for which ten Cake players have qualified via our satellites. Since I'd never been to Melbourne, I thought it was important that we go over some of the key aspects of this town and make sure it was conducive to good times for poker players. So...

All-night convenience store with ATM? Check

Beautiful city skyline? Check

This, by the way, is the view from my hotel room at the Crown Tower, looking across the Yarra River into city centre Melbourne.

Plenty of fish? Check

The Melbourne Aquarium is a five-minute walk from the Crown Casino/Hotel complex where the Aussie Millions is being held.

Gelato? Check

Uncensored Broadband Internet? Check

Soulful sax-playing busker entertaining crowds near Crown Hotel/Casino? Check

Interesting restaurant choices nearby? Check

Sitting inside a Greek restaurant (chicken souvlaki, yum) I took this picture of Hawaiian, Vietnamese, and Korean restaurants sitting right next to each other. You won't have difficulty finding delicious and exotic food in this town.

So, we conclude that Melbourne is in every respect a dynamite place to hold a poker tournament. Of course, no town is without its downsides. Yes, there are plenty of fish, but check this out:

Phil Ivey and Tom Dwan ain't the only sharks in this town

These are actually extremely life-like shark fins bobbing immediately outside the Melbourne Aquarium. Don't you love the Aussie sense of humor?

Also, go back up and check out the picture of the sax player. Note the yellow circle. That's right folks - it's a bagpipe. And frighteningly enough, I had another bagpipe encounter today (more about that later). I guess even a Southern Hemisphere paradise is not without a cloud or two.

Well, many amazing things happened at Cake during 2009. And besides the amazing things, I joined as Cardroom Manager. Heh.

Seriously, it's been an eventful year for us and we ended it with a bang, shipping over $50K to 1$ickDisea$e for taking down the $250K guarantee event this past Sunday. Here's what the final table looked like when we got down to ten players:

The Final Table of the Final $250K Guarantee of the Final Year of the Decade

Then the railbirds did their thing: rooting for their favorites, booing their favorite villains, and moaning at the cruel defeats that no-limit hold'em always delivers. Me, I provided commentary and the occasional bad pun when somebody busted out.

Finally, we got down to RonnieBardah and 1$ick. Trailing in chips, Ronnie decided to jam with a very respectable pair of pocket deuces. But 1$ick woke up with an equally respectable AT. He said, "Sure, let's flip for $20K." Here's the flop:

1$ickDisea$e hits an overcard, leaving Ronnie with two outs

Ronnie couldn't hit his two-out miracle and 1$ickDisease took down $50,500 at the final flagship event of the "naughts".

But it's a new year and we've got big things planned for you. More tournaments, new software, new promotions, and a million reasons to play at Cake Poker.

We'll see you at the tables.

It seems that there are a lot of poker players out there who enjoy Cake Poker’s Weekly $100K Guaranteed; so many in fact that Cake has bumped the Weekly Guaranteed tournament up to $125K.

Combine this with the Monthly $250K Guaranteed as well as all the other smaller guaranteed tourney that litter the Tournament Schedule, Cake now boasts more than $6 million in guaranteed prize pools every month.

Cake Poker’s thriving player base has been bolstered by some recent changes brought on by Card Room Manager, Lee Jones and Cake’s new tournament director. With the introduction of Synchronized Tournaments, as well as an overhauled tournament schedule, the Cake Poker player base just keeps on growing.

The first $125K Guaranteed Tournament will run this Sunday, December 6 at 5pm ET. You can buy-in directly for $168 or qualify through one of the many satellites running all week for as little as $3.